Do You Prefer an Assyrian Man to Share Your Life With? Yes. ...

Not trying to stereotype, but most of the replies to the above question has been a "yes". However, there is a big gap between our men and women. The way we women or most of us see it is that we have at last tasted a freedom we have been deprived of for such a long time. And in many cases, the freedem is cherished to build skills, improve and prove our existence in the community. However, our men do not seem to keep paste with us, thus leading women to look for life partners elsewhere. Could it be that we are asking for the impossible? Should we ignore this desperate need to find a match from within our community, and look elsewhere? Does it not matter that our kids speak their first language as any other than Assyrian. Why cannot a woman from our community express herself as openly as she does with other nationalities without the fear of smearing her name and reputation. If you have answers to all or some of the issues raised above, please reply in honesty, may be by then we can arrange for a group wedding of Assyrian men to Assyrian women.

Ramina M. Dawood
EAMAM NEWSPAPER

In reply to message #0
 
Dear Ramina.

There is freedom and then there is freedom. When the Assyrian women arrive in this country or in North America in general. They get the wrong idea about freedom. This country went through many generations of women being deprived of their rights. It took them ten twenty and even fifty years to get where they are. Assyrians are new comers to this country. We cannot expect them to change their views about women in such a short time. They need time.

Also women get the wrong idea about what freedom is. If it is equality in the work place then they have it. If it is equality at home then for now they cant have that because our men are programmed yet to handle that. A woman must play her roll at home. If she tries to take over the mans roll then it wont work. In nature everything has to be balanced, and this is one of natures things where also a balance is required.

I know a lot of Assyrian women that are married or in a relationship other than an Assyrian man and still have it worst than being married or with an Assyrian man.

Not all Assyrian women are deprived of freedom. Only those with big ego and no brains who think that freedom means going out partying all the time. Sticking their nose in where it should not be stuck. Thinking as an individual and not as a couple, are the one that are feeling they should get more freedom.

And what is Freedom exactly. What do Assyrian women want. Please let me know.

In reply to message #0
 
Even though I am far away from our community in the USA, I m still living at home, I completely agree with u, Ramina. Here in Damascus we face some similar problems. Assyrian girl doesn't like to have an Assyrian companion although we are students here. The problem is that girls are always the only losers of such relation. They actually know that Assyrian boy may smear her with diferent gossip that may run through all the city back home. I think before we call on our girls to stick to our men, we have to make our men free of any complex including the sacredness of vagina. We men have to think more openly and think of how we could be happy with the girl, Assyrian preferably, we love.
I'm a man who believes that my freedom and happiness depend on our women's freedom and hapinness. Let's make a happier future, if not for us, for our children.
SA

In reply to message #0
 
Marriage is hard.
Statistics tell us that a marriage in America won't last. Falling in love with a man can be a fanciful notion. People shy away from commitment. Sexual, religious, political, social freedom are all enticing for men and women. Humans are organisms that do not want to be constricted by norms, rules, and society.

What can unite two people together?
It is certainly not culture, race, geographic locations, social status or education. The Pakistani couple have just as many marital feuds as the White-Asian couple. The couple with phD's have just as many arguments and misunderstandings as the couple who came from Mexico. Couple after couple, it is clear that marriage is an institution that is not realistic.

I want to argue that the only way that two people can respect the institution of marriage is if they understand what marriage is. Marriage is not about having a best friend, or a partner for intercourse, or a business partner, or a rite of passage for society. The only way people can respect marriage is if they understand it is sacred and ordained by God. The bible has amazing passages that describe the beauty of marriage, and, more importantly, it is ordained by God. Therefore, if two people are 'married' to each other with a working understanding of a divine, loving God that transcends them, they now have a will and a purpose and a responsibility for a third, most important party. The argument that hurts your husband now hurts God. A man who cheats on his wife cheats on the God who blessed his marriage. If God is the axis of anyone's relationship, the relationship is given a new meaning and a new purpose.

In a marriage ordained by God, we give up our rights to mercilessly hurt each other, cheat on each other and abuse each other in order to have freedom to love each other. Just as in a democracy, where people voluntarily give up rights in order to form an ordered society and gain rights, the marriage allows a man and a woman to give up rights and shift from acting like an organism to acting like a spiritual being responsible for a greater cause.

Amazing, huh?

To answer your question... no , i don't think that marriage is better or worse with an Assyrian or a non-Assyrian. Marriage is blessed when two people share a higher goal of love and servitude for God. If they both have this higher goal, then they will only desire love and servitude for each other.
Marriage isn't perfect, but if your marriage is ordained by a Perfect God then what have you got to lose?
Julia Sorisho